


The Importance of Being Sirius

by dogsunderfoot (dragondi)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Alternate Universe - Teachers, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, Romance, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-23
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2019-01-20 11:06:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12431493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragondi/pseuds/dogsunderfoot
Summary: R/S Games 2017 - Day 19 - Team SiriusRemus Lupin, a simple Literature teacher has to deal with Sirius Black, a History teacher with an unorthodox (and noisy) teaching style.





	The Importance of Being Sirius

**Author's Note:**

> **Team:** Sirius  
>  **Title:** The Importance of Being Sirius  
>  **Rating:** PG  
>  **Warnings:** Cursing. That's about it!  
>  **Genres:** Fluffy humour  
>  **Word Count:** 8400  
>  **Summary:** Remus Lupin, a simple Literature teacher has to deal with Sirius Black, a History teacher with an unorthodox (and noisy) teaching style.  
>  **Notes:** Thanks and lots and lots of love to H and J for their unending and unyielding support, help, and suggestions. If It weren't for Sirius and Remus, I wouldn't know either one of you, and I certainly wouldn't have stretched my writing muscles in all sorts of directions. My life would be a lot darker as well!  
>  I want to profess my undying love and gratitude and awe for the mods of the Games, who have been unfailingly wonderful. You did marvelous things here, bringing people together who would never have met otherwise. You've helped create friendships and supported a love for two characters ~~who didn't get treated properly by their creator~~ who meant so much to us. Thank you for your time and patience and your determination!  
>  **Prompt:** #42 - "The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it." - Oscar Wilde

As soon as Remus heard the moving of furniture from the classroom beside his, he felt dread steal through him. Some of the other teachers had warned him, so he couldn't say he didn't know it was coming. Still, it had been four days since the beginning of the school term, and he'd hoped the warnings had been a light form of hazing. 

"So, the other day, we discussed Keats and the influence of Lord Byron upon—"

Shouts from the other room drowned him out, and he raised his voice. "We discussed Keats and the influence of Lord Byron upon Keats' poetry and his—"

The shouts became screams of pain and horror, and Remus froze. What was going on over there? "Just a moment," he told his class, heading for the door.

"Sir?" One of the boys was tentatively raising his hand.

"Yes, Irving?"

The boy stood up beside his chair, and Remus noticed that the boy's lips were twitching as if he wanted to smile but was afraid to. "All that noise? That's Mr Black. He's—" The boy fought for the right words. "He's a very different kind of teacher."

Remus frowned. "Maybe I should have a quick look just to be sure."

"Really, sir," insisted a girl sitting in front of Irving. "What you're hearing right now is the way Mr Black's classes go. Mrs Pennington nearly had a coronary last year when she couldn't get him to stop."

"The vein in her temple would throb," announced another boy, with a little too much enthusiasm, Remus thought. Pointing to the side of his head, the boy continued. "You could see it, and she'd reach for her migraine pills."

Remus hesitated, because he honestly didn't know what to do in this situation. He didn't know the students well enough to decide whether they were telling the truth or not, but their reactions in conjunction with the comments from other staff members finally made him decide to continue with his instruction the best that he could.

Two and a half hours and two classes later, the students trooped out, leaving him to silently contemplate the wall that formed the barrier between his and Sirius Black's classroom. The other morning classes had been as loud as the first one, to Remus' disgust. Remus had to do something. He just wished he knew the man better. He and Black had been invited, along with the other teachers, to the Headmaster's annual Tea Social for the staff members a week before the term began. Black was the tall, dark, and handsome type, but there was a devilish gleam in the grey eyes, and a smile just lopsided enough (and yet wide enough) to be impudent. But he hadn't talked to Black, other than a perfunctory handshake and greeting. After that, Black had disappeared, and it wasn't until the first day of school that someone told Remus that Black's father had died, and he would be gone for the first three days of school. 

So, what was a man to do? Remus hated to go over and create a scene with a man who'd just lost his father. Yet, he couldn't continue to yell over Black's instructional shenanigans; he'd be incapable of speech in two days. "We're colleagues. It's perfectly natural to talk to one another," Remus decided, speaking aloud. Inwardly, his thoughts went to how it really wouldn't hurt to get a glimpse of those grey eyes again.

Shoving such improper thoughts out of his mind, Remus went next door and peered in. Black was writing on the board, and Remus was able to admire the way the man's shoulders fit the navy blazer he was wearing. _Stop it, Remus. He's a fellow teacher, and you've only met him once. Though, there's nothing wrong with looking…Idiot! Stop it!_ He cleared his throat, "Mr Black?"

The man turned, a smile appearing as he did. "Yes? Oh, it's you! Lupin, right?"

"Yes. I'm in—"

"So good to see you again." The man crossed the room in long strides, stretching his hand out towards Remus. "I regret not having been able to have another chat with you, but circumstances demanded I be elsewhere."

Remus took the man's hand and held it firmly for a moment before letting go. "I did hear about your father. My sincerest condolences." 

Black gave a dismissive wave. "It was my father. Could have been worse."

Remus blinked in surprise. "Er—"

"He supported Liverpool and I love Man U." Black shrugged. "Do you really need to know anything else to know how bad our relationship was?" He grinned. "I left home when I was sixteen, and I haven't talked to my family in years. Don't tell Dumbledore, but I spent the last three days in France instead of at the funeral."

It was on the tip of Remus' tongue to exclaim, "You never!" but somehow the words, "Where in France?" emerged instead.

"The Camargue. Have you been?"

"No. I hear it's beautiful."

"It's incredible," Black affirmed. "If you need a place to retreat to, it's perfect."

"I'll keep it in mind," Remus said. "Look, I wanted to talk to you about something."

Black glanced at his watch. "I hate to be rude, but this won't take long, will it? I do need lunch."

"No, no. It'll only take a moment."

Black put one foot up on the seat of a chair and crossed his arms on the top of his leg. "What can I do for you?"

"Well, I couldn't help but notice that your classes this morning were very loud. It was very difficult for my students to hear and concentrate."

"Oh! Sorry! Sometimes we get carried away." Black smiled. "And, by that, I mean _I_ get carried away. I love History, and I was cursed with boring History teachers. I decided I didn't want other children to suffer in the same way, so I do try to make things more interesting than they are in the book."

"By the sound, it seems as if you're succeeding," Remus said drily.

"I'd like to think so." Black put his foot back down and headed back to the whiteboard. He glanced over his shoulder. "Is there anything else I can do for you, Lupin?"

"No, that's all." Remus hesitated all the same, then asked, "Not going to lunch?"

Sirius pointed to a brown bag sitting on his desk. "I typically make my lunch and find somewhere different to eat."

"Variety being the spice of life?" Remus quipped.

"You know it." Sirius grinned.

"Well. Enjoy." Not knowing what else to say, Remus left.

That afternoon, Remus noticed that the History classes did seem to be somewhat quieter. There was still noise, but it was nothing that Remus couldn't easily talk over.

As he closed his classroom door that afternoon, he hesitated then headed over to Black's classroom to thank him for keeping the noise down. The other teacher was already gone. He hadn't walked past Remus' door, so he must have gone out the back door, Remus supposed. 

At dinner, Remus settled in at a staff table with some of the teachers he'd befriended. Black came in late and seated himself at another staff table several feet away. Within minutes, that table was roaring with laughter.

Alastor Moody, one of the other History teachers, noticed Remus' eyes drifting towards that table throughout the meal. He leaned in towards Remus and said, "Black shows up and laughter and nonsense follow."

"He's very… personable," Remus commented.

Moody chuckled. "He is. He's also stubborn and has the attention span of a midge. I should know. I taught him when he was a boy and I have been his mentor."

"He was a student here?" Remus felt his eyebrows rise a little.

"He was. And he was the kind of student that you both hated and loved. Drove us insane because of his inability to sit still and pay attention, but he could talk himself out of any corner. He made good grades without even trying."

"Except in Chemistry," Horace Slughorn said with a chuckle. "He was in my Chemistry classes when he was a student."

"Blew up the Chemistry lab twice," Moody recalled. 

"Twice, and caused a small fire as well," Slughorn amended.

"I'm surprised you'd let him into a Chem lab after that," Remus said with a chuckle of his own. 

"The Headmaster banned him from taking another Chemistry course." Moody laughed loudly, banging the table with his fist. "I think he was pissed off that he couldn't do it again."

"Do what again? Take Chemistry or blow up the lab?" Remus asked.

"Blow up the lab, of course!" Slughorn replied.

They all laughed, and then someone asked Slughorn about something regarding the Sciences department, and the conversation went on from there. 

The next day, the History classes were fairly quiet—until the end of the day. During the last period of the day, Remus again heard the sound of desks being pushed aside. Remus' students looked over their shoulders at the wall separating the rooms, and Remus caught more than one envious expression. 

"So, who can tell me the characteristics of a sonnet?" he asked.

And then the sound of moans filled the air, and a handbell clanged. Someone began to yell, and Remus listened intently. "What in the world?" 

"The Black Death," someone said knowingly. 

"What?" Remus knew his eyebrows were hitting his browline. 

"They're doing the Black Death," one of the students replied.

That was something Remus had to see. He walked out of the room to Black's door. Without knocking, he opened the door and stepped inside. There were at least a dozen students on the ground, all moaning with enthusiasm. Two boys in ragged robes were walking around, one ringing the bell, the other yelling, "Bring out your dead! Bring out your--!" 

He caught sight of Remus and stopped, turning towards Black, who was sitting on his desk at the front of the room, watching the tableau. Black's eyes went to Remus and he grinned. "Mr Lupin! Don't breathe too deeply, or you'll catch the plague."

"Mr Black—"

"Let me guess. Too loud?"

"Er, maybe just a little," Remus agreed.

"Sorry." Black's tone was hardly remorseful, and his words confirmed it. "People are dying in here, though."

"Do you think they could be called out by a softer bell?" Remus asked.

Black affected a stricken look. "People are dying all around us, and we need to get the dead out into the streets or even more people will die. You don't want more people to die because they didn't hear the bell, do you?"

Remus opened his mouth to answer, but then realised he had no idea what to say. "Could you just please keep it down a little?"

Black grinned. "We'll do what we can."

It did get a little quieter, though not much. Still, it was enough that Remus could finish the class without screaming.

The weekend came, and Remus treated himself by visiting his friend Lily. They had gone to university together, and had both been hired that year. Lily was working at a primary school in the Yorkshires, and had a thousand stories to tell about her students and their families. Remus had fewer stories to tell about his students' families, but he was able to tell her about his fellow teachers, including the unrepentant Black. 

"He does sound like a good teacher, though," Lily said, her expression telling Remus that she hated to say the words because she knew Remus wouldn't want to hear them.

"I suppose," Remus said. "But it's difficult to compete with him."

"Why do you have to?" Lily asked. "He doesn't teach Literature."

"No, but how can Keats' 'Ode to a Grecian Urn' compete with the Black Death?" Remus took a deep drink of wine.

Lily began to laugh. "Maybe you could have the kids dress up in Greek robes."

"Points to the students who come up with an urn costume?" Remus asked, starting to smile.

"There you go!" Lily said. "If you can't beat them, join them."

Remus chuckled. "Quite so."

Those words rang in Remus' head several times in the next week, and they seemed to taunt him more than once.

\-------

_Mr Black,_  
Do you think you could turn down the sounds of the guns and explosions?  
R. Lupin

__**Mr Lupin,  
** How do you expect us to fight the Battle of the Somme without guns and explosions?  
S. Black 

\--------

_Mr Black,_  
Are the screams of 'Viva La Revolution!' really necessary?  
R. Lupin

__**Mr Lupin,  
** Would you rather we scream 'Viva La Tyrannie'? I would never have taken you for such a man.  
S. Black 

\--------

_Really Black? Bagpipes?_

_**Really, Lupin! Bagpipes! (By the way, you forgot a comma there.)** _

_I may have forgotten the comma due to the trauma of hearing bagpipes._

_**Just trying to prove the point that bagpipes on a battlefield could be both inspiring and terrifying.** _

_Can you not prove that point outside?_

_**You have noticed that it's raining?** _

_Exactly._

_**And have the students catch cold?** _

_Just the bagpiper._

_**You are a terrible person, Lupin.** _

\-----------

_For the love of God, Black! I am trying to give an exam over here!_

_**For the love of Thor, Lupin! The Vikings are raiding a village! Won't you save us?** _

_Will it allow my students to finish taking their exam?_

_**Probably not.** _

_Therein lies your answer._

\---------

"So, I hear you have been relegated to sending notes to Black when his lessons get too rambunctious," Moody said casually one evening during dinner.

"You heard that? From whom?" Remus asked with only a hint of curiosity.

"The students. They see all, they hear all, and they tell all," Moody replied.

"It's becoming a great source of amusement," Slughorn commented.

"The amusement of the students is a worthy goal, is it not?" Remus poured a little more water into his glass.

"Not if it comes at your expense," Moody pointed out.

Remus mulled over the man's words for a moment then asked, "Black said he had been cursed with boring History teachers, yet you say you were his teacher. Did he consider you boring?"

Moody laughed curtly. "I imagine there were times he did, yes. I did attempt to let the students enact scenes, so they could see how they'd play out. Black was seemingly apathetic to History for the first couple of years here. He seemed more concerned with entertaining his friends. After I had him play the part of William the Conqueror though, it seemed to solidify something inside of him. I never had another problem with him not paying attention in class."

"William the Conqueror?" Remus smiled and shook his head. "Somehow, it does not disappoint, knowing that he found his calling through becoming a king. He certainly seems to think he reigns over our wing of the building."

"Miss Greylock is across from you, is she not?" Slughorn asked. "What does she say of him?"

"Not much," Remus said. "Of course, she's half-deaf and can't hear the students in her own room, much less the bagpiper down the hall."

Roars of laughter came from the teachers sitting around the table. 

"I'd heard he had a bagpiper in," said Flitwick, one of Remus' fellow Literature teachers. "I almost doubted it until I realised we were talking about Sirius Black."

"What do I do?" Remus almost begged, his dismay suddenly rising to the surface. "I can't go all year like this, can I?"

"You could talk to the Headmaster, but I doubt he'll do much," Flitwick said. "He likes the fact that Sirius is… unconventional."

Moody thoughtfully rubbed his chin. "You know who you could talk to? McGonagall. She was one of the few who Black was sincerely afraid of."

"Doesn't she teach Grammar in the Junior School?" Remus asked.

"She does, but her impact is long reaching," Flitwick said with a bright smile.

"Maybe if I just talk to him one more time—" began Remus.

Laughter rang out again. "You do that, Lupin. You do that." Moody patted Remus on the shoulder.

\-----

_Mr Black,_  
Oscar Wilde said, "The only duty we owe history is to rewrite it." He did not say that our duty to history was to re-enact it at the loudest volume possible.  
R. Lupin

__**Mr Lupin,  
** It was also Oscar Wilde who said, "Education is a wonderful thing, provided you always remember that nothing worth knowing can ever be taught."  
S. Black 

_Mr Black,_  
Then what are you endeavouring to do over there? You were hired to teach, or so I would assume.  
R. Lupin 

__**Remus,  
** History is doomed to repeat itself, they say. I intend for the kids to understand how the same mistakes are made over and over again. How better to do it than to make them experience it, even through such a simple means as re-enacting it?  
Sirius (Surely, you know me well enough for us to be on a first name basis, don't you?) 

_Mr Black_  
I hardly know you at all. You never eat lunch with the teachers, and rarely do you eat lunch in the dining hall. I would think you were a unicorn, were it not for the constant barrage of noise on the other side of the wall and these notes.  
Lupin. 

__**Remus,  
** I take umbrage, sir. Complete umbrage at the use of your word 'constant'. If you only knew how often I plan quieter activities to suit your tender senses, you'd be impressed.  
I do, however, appreciate the fact that you compare me to a unicorn, because I do think I am a rather unique and fantastical creature.  
Sirius. (Formality for this modern age is completely unexpected—and just plain odd.) 

_Mr Black_  
You lecture me about formality in this age being completely unexpected and odd, yet you claim to take umbrage at something I've said? You are a hypocrite, Mr Black. And more than a little conceited.  
Lupin 

_**At least I'm not calling you out for a duel at ten paces.** _

_I'm sure you would dramatize that in your classroom, if you did._

_**God, I love your wit, Remus! I wonder what else I'd love about you, if given half a chance. How about if we actually meet in person? How about if you stop at my rooms tonight for a drink of brandy? You do drink brandy, don't you?** _

Remus left the note unanswered for two periods. He wasn't quite sure how to take Black's invitation. Was there something more to the note than it seemed, or was he to take it at face value? He didn't know. He finally sent back an answer. _I do drink brandy, yes. Would eight o'clock suit you?_

The answer came back almost immediately. _**Eight is perfect.**_

\-----------

At two minutes before eight o'clock, Remus tapped on Black's door. He could hear music coming from the other side of the door, and knocked again, louder this time. Black jerked the door open before Remus had a chance to lower his hand.

"Hail, fellow, and well met!" Black's enthusiastic greeting had Remus smiling right away. "Come in."

"Hello, Mr Black. Thank you for the invitation."

Black shut the door behind Remus and motioned to the couch. "Have a seat, Remus. I hope you're hungry. I put together a small snack to go with the brandy."

"A snack is most welcome," Remus said, noticing how Black's ass filled out a pair of jeans perfectly as the other man walked out of the room. 

"Oh, good!" From the other room, Black called, "The brandy is on the bookshelf in the corner, if you'd like to pour for the two of us?" 

Remus went over to the bookshelf and found the bottle of brandy as well as glasses. He didn't know how much he was supposed to pour, but settled on slightly less than half filled. He was carrying the two glasses back to the couch when Black came out with two plates. "I hope you like crème brûlée."

"One of my favourites," Remus said with a smile.

They sat down, Remus on the couch, Black in an extremely worn reclining chair beside the couch. "We should have gotten together before this," Black said, reaching for the brandy. "As the two youngest teachers on the staff, we should stick together."

"Is there a particular need for us to stick together?" Remus wanted to know.

"Not necessarily," Black said, his right shoulder rising and lowering in a nonchalant shrug. "But I have no doubt there will come a day when the question will be asked if we want to continue holiday pay or if we want to place our money into a funerary fund. I have no doubt that Slughorn might try to swing the staff in favour of the second option, so I desperately need someone to side with me."

"Good Lord!" Remus exclaimed. "Has that particular issue been raised?"

Black laughed. "Not yet. At least, not seriously. Sluggy did mention it once, but I think the gasps of horror that went through the room were enough to contain him."

"That is a relief," Remus said. "At my last job, my employer suggested putting money into some stock options instead of giving me sick pay, so I am a bit sensitive to this."

"Stock options? What stock?"

"I won't say, but the company closed this past winter, having exhausted all their options."

Black snorted in disdain and took a bite of his crème brûlée. "Oh, this is nice. Try it."

Remus did as his host bade, and he moaned in appreciation. "Delicious. Mr Black, you have a knack for this. Truly, you may have missed your calling altogether."

Black grinned at him. "I really didn't make it. And, please, call me Sirius."

Remus lowered his fork slowly. "You didn't make it? What would possess you to claim that you had?"

"I didn't claim I had."

"But you said—" Remus tried to remember the man's exact words, and as he did, he felt his face warm with embarrassment. "Oh, dear. I did misinterpret that."

"It's quite all right. I'm so sorry you were disappointed, I shall attempt to make a dessert the next time you come over."

"You know that's unnecessary," Remus told him.

"I know, but I feel as if I have to make up for the misunderstanding."

"If you want something to make up for, you could always make up for interrupting my classes with your racket."

Black's grin was at the same time both friendly and mischievous. "Presenting you with a 'make up gift' for that assumes that I know I was in the wrong and will do what I can to fix it. I do not think I'm inclined to do that. Not when we have Henry VIII, the Boxer Rebellion, and the American Revolution coming up in the next few weeks."

Remus groaned. "Bloody hell!"

"You're welcome to come over and take part during your planning periods. You could be Pope Clement VII or Sir Thomas More to my Henry VIII."

"I feel as if I am already," Remus said drily. 

Black laughed. "Don't you know the adage, 'If you can't beat them, join them'?"

"I may have heard it before, but I never thought I'd have to apply it to the History teacher in the room next to mine."

"Come to the Dark Side. We have cookies," Black quipped. Remus realised his confusion was evident, because Black explained quickly, "Internet meme. Very popular with Star Wars fans."

"Are there really cookies involved?" Remus asked, wondering if humour was the way to getting Black to settle down a little in the classroom.

"Well, I suppose, theoretically, there could be. There's certainly some incredible crème brûlée."

"There is at that," Remus conceded with a smile. 

They talked for two hours, each admitting at the end of the night that it felt as if they'd known each other forever. Somewhere in the course of the evening, Remus found himself calling his host by his first name instead of his last name. Sirius made a point of teasing him about that.

"I will have to make a point of eating lunch in the dining hall more often," Sirius said. "Or, if you'd like, you could bring your own lunch and eat with me."

"Really?" Remus was surprised Sirius would make that offer.

"Really." Sirius smiled. 

Remus felt tingles throughout his body and he couldn't understand why. "I'd like that. Very much."

\--------- 

And, indeed, Remus did like having lunch with Sirius. Very much. Lunch became something that he looked forward to, even after the morning where he had to angrily inform Sirius that he doubted sincerely that Churchill, Roosevelt, and Stalin made _that_ much noise at the Yalta Conference, or when he pounded on the wall with his fist because was Sirius was yelling something that was incomprehensible through the thin plaster walls. Remus feared he'd broken his hand that day.

Sirius was kind enough to fetch a bucket of ice for Remus, claiming it was the least that Horatio Lord Nelson could do for a vanquished rival.

They talked about anything and everything over the next couple of months. Remus told Sirius about being frequently sick as a child and having to stay in bed for days at a time. This led to his love of reading and his desire to introduce children to the heroes of his childhood: Bilbo, Jim Hawkins, Prince Caspian, King Arthur, and so many others. Sirius told him about being born to a rich family who expected him to be everything that he wasn't: conservative, social-conscious, money-hungry, and ready to follow the footsteps of so many of the other family members and become a lawyer. 

"Their hopes were dashed when I decided to teach history. They talked about cutting me off financially to force me to become a lawyer. I told them I'd move out and start my own life, but I'd have to get a job or two to support myself. When I told them I thought their golf club might hire me as a waiter in their private dining room, they backed down. They knew I'd do it, and they didn't want their friends to see me working like a peasant."

"So, did they pay for you to become a history teacher, then?" Remus asked.

Sirius licked some mustard from the corner of his mouth. Remus hoped it wasn't obvious that he was staring. "They paid for the first two years. But then my brother discovered my deepest, darkest secret. It was too much for my parents to handle, so they wrote me off completely then."

"Do I get to know what that deepest, darkest secret is?" Remus asked, striving to sound casual so that Sirius wouldn't be offended if he didn't want to tell.

Sirius smiled at him. "You don't want to guess?"

"I'm sure I couldn't."

"Not even one tiny guess?"

"If I guess incorrectly, I'll look completely ridiculous. If I guess correctly, then it might be very embarrassing for you, because obviously your deepest, darkest secret couldn't be that utterly terrible." Remus chuckled. "Unless you want to admit to being a murderous drug lord in an international drug cartel that occasionally dabbles in the sex trade."

"Ooh, that was good," Sirius said with an approving nod. "That would be a much deeper and darker secret. Though, most drug lords are not always very secretive about their wealth or their power. They do have a tendency to flaunt it."

"History would tell us that, of course," Remus teased.

"You know it," Sirius grinned impudently.

"So, now that I've made a guess—and been completely wrong—are you going to tell me?"

"Since my secret really isn't that secret anymore, I suppose I can."

Remus looked at him expectantly.

"I'm bisexual," Sirius said, the brightness of his grin completely undiminished. "Unapologetically and enthusiastically."

Remus could only hope that he didn't sound too excited at Sirius' revelation as he repeated, "Unapologetically and enthusiastically? It sounds as if those two words have a large number of stories behind them."

Sirius' grin disappeared, to be replaced by a rather determined expression. "Remus, if there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that you should find what you love and do it. Unapologetically and enthusiastically. You'll never make everyone happy, so why try? Make yourself happy and everything else will fall in line."

Remus smiled. "Unapologetically and enthusiastically certain describes your manner of teaching."

"Exactly! Teaching, my relationships, whatever I do, I use that as my mantra. I give Oscar Wilde the credit."

"Oscar Wilde?" Remus chuckled. "Definitely a man who would have appreciated that, but I seem to remember he said, 'Everything in moderation, including moderation.'"

"Bloody hell. Of all his quotes, this is the one that speaks to you?" Sirius all but wailed with dismay.

"I didn't say it spoke to me. It simply seemed at cross purposes to your mantra." Remus popped a grape into his mouth.

"Oh, thank God. I was afraid you were going to claim that to be your inspiration. I was going to have to inform you that moderation breeds dullness. Then I'd have to say you were dull and throw another Wilde quote at you."

"Which one?"

"'Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.' Which, by the way, is one reason why I avoid breakfast in the dining hall." Sirius took another bite of his sandwich.

"You avoid breakfast because you like to sleep in."

"I said it was one reason, not the only reason."

"Fair point." They paused to eat a few more bites, then Remus asked, "So, what Oscar Wilde quote was it that made you realise you had to come out to your parents?"

"Oh!" Sirius chewed quickly, swallowed then said, "Well, actually, it was a combination of two. I decided to read 'The Picture of Dorian Gray'—incredible premise, fabulous book—and came across the quote, 'Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you! Let nothing be lost upon you. Be always searching for new sensations. Be afraid of nothing.'"

Remus nodded and gave Sirius a small smile. "I remember reading 'Be afraid of nothing' and wishing I could live that way, to be fearful of nothing. It seems freeing."

"Doesn't it?" Sirius exclaimed. "So, I read it, and as I was trying to somehow assimilate that into my life, I read another Oscar Wilde quote that finally did it. 'To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.' And that was when I realised that was what I had been doing: existing. I was existing in the world that my parents had established for me. I wasn't _living._ So, I decided that I wasn't going to be one of those horrible depressing Byronic poet types. I wasn't going to just do what was expected of me. I needed to make a break of things for good and establish myself as my own person. Either my parents would accept me or not, but I was going to live life on my own terms and be happy."

"And the first thing you did was to come out to your parents?"

"That wasn't the first thing. I started out gradually: refusing to attend family functions, saying exactly what I was thinking instead of the typical social niceties, let my grades drop in the interests of sex, alcohol, and laziness… And that was when I decided to let them see I was not going to marry the girl next door simply because they wished it. I decided to let them know that I could very easily have married the boy next door instead."

Remus had a grape halfway to his mouth, but paused and asked with dread, "How exactly did you do this? I am going to assume it was very imaginative."

The impudent grin returned. "Oh, my brother found me in bed with the son of my mother's best friend and the daughter of my father's best friend. At the same time."

Remus felt his eyebrows rise. "I have to admit, that might top any other story I've heard about someone coming out."

"Well, I figured the shock would make it sink in a lot quicker, and they wouldn't be able to deny it. Especially since I arranged my brother to be the one to find me."

"You contrived it all?" Remus gasped.

"Yes. I felt bad that Natalia and Bryan got caught up in it. Though, I suppose I shouldn't. They got married after that."

Remus could just stare at him. 

"I've stunned you into complete silence," Sirius observed. "Should I be worried or proud of myself?"

"A little of both, I think," Remus admitted. "So, your parents found out about your sexuality. What happened then?"

"There was a lot of screaming and yelling on both sides, and they told me they would choose a girl for me to marry. I refused, there was more screaming and yelling, and they finally told me I should leave. So, I did."

"Where did you go?"

"Remember I told you about my friend, James? I went to his place. His parents were kind enough to let me stay there until I got a place of my own."

Remus took a long drink of water, but before he could formulate his next question, Sirius asked "So, how did you come out to your parents?"

Remus choked as the water went down the wrong way. Sirius chuckled. "Did you think I didn't know?"

Remus sucked in a deep breath. "Well, I don't make a point of announcing it. You know I'm close to my parents. They suspected. When I was talking more about a boy in my Maths class than which girl I wanted to take to our school's Christmas Ball, my mother finally asked me about it. I told her I thought I was gay, and she just nodded and said she'd thought so. We talked a little bit about it, and then she said she hoped I could help her redecorate the living room."

Sirius laughed.

Remus smiled and shook his head. "She was disappointed to know that I really don't have a knack for decorating at all."

"I've seen your apartment," Sirius said. "I agree with that."

"Hey! My apartment is very nice, thank you very much," Remus protested.

"Nice in an eclectic, let's-just-buy-this-because-it's-cheap, no-I-don't-like-the-style-but-I-really-need-a-chair-for-my-desk-so-that-one'll-do sort of way," Sirius teased, punching Remus lightly in the arm.

"You have a brown recliner that looks as if it's been through the Hundred Years War and every war since then," Remus pointed out. "Those in glass houses..."

"It's comfortable!" Sirius objected.

"It's a wreck."

"It's an antique."

"It's rubbish. It has a spring sticking out of it."

"If you would have sat slightly to the right, as I told you to, the spring wouldn't have poked you."

"Who stops to think before they sit down, 'Oh, I have to sit to the right or I get stabbed by a spring?'" Remus demanded.

"You will now, every time you sit in that chair." Sirius grinned.

Remus just stared at him. "Fair point. But, it's a moot point, because I refuse to sit in that chair now."

"'Moot'. There's a word no one uses enough," Sirius remarked.

"Does that in itself make the word moot?" Remus asked.

Sirius began to laugh. "I love your sense of humour, Lupin."

"You're not so bad yourself, Black," Remus replied, caught up in the warm, fuzzy sensation that Sirius' laugh seemed to bring on more and more.

\-----

_Sirius. Honest to God, man. If I hear 'Yankee Doodle' one more time during this class period, I will personally come over and throttle you._

__

_**I didn't know you were into erotic asphyxiation!** _

This is where your mind goes?

_**I'm afraid so. Brandy and glazed pears at mine tonight? No erotic asphyxiation involved. Unless you want to choke the pears.** _

You're so strange, Sirius. I'll be there. 

__

\------

__

__  


SIRIUS! You're supposed to be teaching History, and not Hollywood's version of it! I sincerely doubt William Wallace delivered that exact bloody speech!

_**You don't know that he didn't.** _

Even if he did, does it require that speech to be delivered at that volume?

__

**How do you expect the Scots in the last ranks to hear such words of inspiration? It's a good thing that Wallace didn't have a Lit teacher yelling at him all the time or Scotland would have lost their independence hundreds of years earlier than they did.**

__

Fuck you, Black.

_**Is that an invitation?** _

_**Remus, did you get my last question?** _

I did. I'm ignoring it.

_**Oh, thank God. I was afraid someone had stolen your phone and was, perhaps, showing off your text with the possible invitation to everyone on campus.** _

First of all, it wasn't an invitation. Second of all, it wasn't an invitation.

_**Damn.  
Chocolate torte and red wine tonight?** _

Sounds perfect. But no more of the Star Wars movies with that terrible creature in them.

_**Jar Jar Binks isn't that bad!** _

To anyone with any taste, he is.

_**Snob.** _

Did you not call yourself a snob two nights ago because you like classical music instead of hip hop?

_**Shut up, Lupin.** _

\------

__  
**Remus,  
**  
What in the bloody blue blazes is going on over there?

Sirius, I am taking a page out of your teaching manual. Macbeth and Banquo have been busy fighting two invading armies: one Irish, the other from Norway. Victory is almost assured.

_**That is not fucking fair.** _

What? As far as I'm concerned, what's good for the gander should be good for the other gander.

_**But you're having fun over there without me!** _

Stop whining. You have enough fun in your own class.

_**I knew you'd succumb to the Dark Side. You could have at least let me come over and play King Duncan!** _

I should have you come over and play Lady Macbeth. I'm sure you'd do her 'Out damned spot' lines beautifully.

_**You know I would!** _

You're such a twit.

_**'You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.** _

Is that more Oscar Wilde?

_**'Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit!' Oscar has a quote for everything!** _

I am not fond of you at all. In fact, I might hate you. Oscar would probably hate you too.

_**No, he wouldn't. He'd think I was fun. At any rate, don't hate me. Hate is too great a burden to bear.** _

And now you're throwing Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at me?

_**Great words from a great man. I could quote Bob Marley song lyrics, if you'd rather.** _

I do love your sense of humour, Black.

_**Of course you do. I'm hilarious.** _

\-----

__  
**Well? How did it go with Macbeth?**  


He died at the end.

_**Shouldn't you have started that with 'SPOILER:'?** _

You did ask... Scotch and brioche bread pudding tonight?

_**I'll be there at eight.** _

\-------

_I hate to ask…_

__

_**Waterloo! By the way: SPOILER: England wins. France loses.  
See how that works?** _

__

_That was so funny, I forgot to laugh._

\------

__  
**That new Italian restaurant in town is open. Want to try it out?**  


I have essays to mark.

_**So do I, but I'd do better marking them on a full spaghetti-filled stomach. Come on, Remus. Wouldn't you like to have some good food before you try to decipher Rory Hayworth's handwriting? Don't you deserve some wine before trying to unravel Patricia Spencer's very interesting brand of logic?** _

When you put it like that, how could I resist?

_**My point exactly.** _

\-------

Remus sat down next to Moody at the table, and turned his plate a little before picking up his fork. He noticed Moody's gaze was upon him, so he looked at the older man expectantly.

"How was dinner last night?"

Remus felt his heart race a little faster. "It was good. The bread was still hot when they brought it to the table, the noodles were perfectly al dente, and the meatballs were—What?" 

Moody smirked. "I know the food is good. I've been there."

"Then what?"

Slughorn, casually slathering butter on his bread, said, "He's asking how your date with Sirius Black went last night."

Remus blinked. "My date? It wasn't a date."

"No?" Slughorn looked surprised.

"No! It was just dinner!"

Moody chuckled. "A dinner for two in a nice little Italian place, probably seated in a corner table with candles and violins play—"

"It wasn't like that," Remus protested, feeling heat crawl up his neck as it usually did when he was blushing. It was just dinner."

The men around the table chortled.

"Impossible old gossips," Remus snapped, focusing on his plate.

\-------

Try as he might, Remus couldn't get that simple probing conversation out of his mind. He also couldn't stop thinking about how his feelings for Sirius had deepened in the past few months. He wondered if Sirius felt the same. The man seemed to enjoy spending time with Remus. He recommended things to do just as much as Remus did. He seemed to like trading ridiculous notes and texts as much as Remus did. The problem was that Remus had never been a very forward man when it came to dating, and the few times he'd attempted a conversation about taking a friendship to the next level, he'd been friend-zoned. Things with Sirius were even more complicated because they were working together. What would happen if they did start dating, only to break up messily?

The problem was that everything about Sirius was so tempting. Remus found himself tempted to text him instead of teaching. He was tempted to stare at the screen of his phone instead of doing his lesson plans, waiting for some kind of witty remark or comment. He was tempted to watch Sirius' throat as the man drank anything, even water, which led to him thinking about how he wanted to kiss that throat and work his way down from there. He was tempted to watch how Sirius' tongue curled around the tines of his fork or when he licked something from the corner of his mouth, and imagined what it might be like to have that tongue lapping at his body. Remus was tempted to stare at those grey eyes when they were talking, to watch how they turned from cold steel to warm ash, depending on Sirius' mood, and wondered what colour they became when Sirius made love to someone. Remus was tempted to touch the strong, masculine hands as they reached for a book or a glass or a pen, which led to thoughts of what those hands might feel like upon his own body. Everything about Sirius was tempting, and Remus didn't dare do anything about it. 

Though, he thought he might, if Sirius would just tempt him at just the right time…

\-------

__  
**I have a brilliant idea.**  


Does it entail blowing something up, kidnapping anything, or result in me losing my job?

_**While blowing something up does sound like fun, kidnapping is too much of a hassle, and I would never want you to lose your job, because no one else has ever sent me such amusing notes about the noise in my classroom. So, no.** _

_**I was thinking that maybe we could work together on something, if Dumbledore would allow it.** _

I have never known anyone who takes longer to get to the point than you. Are you going to tell me your brilliant idea or not?

_**We are leading up to the War of the Roses. Would you be willing to teach Shakespeare's Henry plays? Even just one? You're always teaching something of Shakespeare's. Why not one of those?** _

What's in it for me?

_**Listen at him! Cheeky thing! Why does there have to be anything in it for you? This is for the children. The children, Remus! Think of the children!** _

I am. Thusly the question: what's in it for me?

_**What would you like? Name it and it will be yours.** _

How about a date?

_**What date would you like? 3 January? 7 May? 14 August? Pick one. Though, why you'd like a date on the calendar is beyond me. Is it to be Remus Lupin Day?** _

You are making things difficult. You know what I mean.

_**Do I, Remus? Do I know what you mean?** _

Remus stared at his phone. His heart was beating nearly out of his chest. This was it. He was really asking Sirius for a date. He glanced around the room and, seeing that the children were busily working on the study guide he'd given them, cleared his throat. "Pardon me for a moment."

They barely looked up as he went out of the room.

He hesitated before knocking at Sirius' classroom door. It was eerily silent inside, and he smiled to himself, wondering if Sirius had the students acting out a failed Antarctic expedition. Forgoing the knock, he opened the door as quietly as he could, only to see that the room was empty except for Sirius, who was sitting behind his desk, looking at his phone.

"Where are the students?" Remus asked in shock. "You didn't blow them up, did you?"

"How could I? I'm not in Chemistry." Sirius laid his phone down and stood. "I told them I'd let them out a few minutes early if they promised to use the extra time to study somewhere. Big exam tomorrow. So, did you come over to pick a date?"

"Be serious, Sirius." Remus wondered if the butterflies in his stomach were equipped with spikes on the edges of their wings. Asking a simple question shouldn't be that difficult or that painful. "I just thought it might be nice if we went out on an actual date. Just for fun, I suppose." Before Sirius could say anything, he quickly added, "If you don’t want to, I understand. I know dating a colleague isn't always a well-advised thing to do, but we get along so well, and I was just thinking that we could, you know. We've been friends now for several months. Maybe we could see about taking our friendship to another level. Nothing too crazy, just… It might be nice to try something, er, to do—" He broke off completely embarrassed at the hash he was making of this. 

As he rambled, Sirius had moved to stand in front of him. He looked as if he might laugh. "Remus, why are you so nervous? It's just me, and our first date went well. Why wouldn't I want to go on another?"

Remus stared at him. "Our first date?"

"The Italian place. Remember?"

"That was a date?"

Sirius laughed. "Remus, I invited you, I paid for dinner… I even dressed up with an actual tie for you. I don't do that for everyone."

"I just thought it was a dinner between friends," Remus said weakly.

"All right, so I didn't kiss you goodnight, but you did rather ruin the moment by talking about Slughorn and his gout."

Remus felt himself blushing. "I didn't realise you were thinking about it or I wouldn't have mentioned Slughorn then."

Sirius chuckled softly. "You are adorable when you blush."

"Shut it. I am not."

"I happen to think you are." Sirius shocked him by reaching out to touch his face. "Remus, I have been making innuendos and sexual comments to you for months now. I've been waiting for something more from you, and I was beginning to worry I was misreading you. I'd love another date—or a first date, if you'd rather. I would love to see where we could go with our relationship."

Remus felt a wave of relief go through him. "I'm glad. I was worried that I was misreading you, too."

"Never worry about that," Sirius said with a short chuckle. "I'm terribly obvious. You just didn't want to believe it." And with that, he leaned in and gently pressed his lips to Remus'.

Warmth of a much different kind than embarrassment flooded through Remus, and he responded by putting his hands on Sirius' hips to steady himself while he deepened the kiss. He couldn't say there were bright fireworks or that a grand, glorious version of Beethoven's 'Ode to Joy' started playing in his head. Instead, he felt a little as if he'd had too much champagne, to the point that he almost wanted to laugh. 

It took him a moment to realize it was happiness, extreme and pure. 

He pulled away and looked into Sirius' grey eyes and smiled to see the velvety softness there. "I will never talk about Slughorn again, if I know that's going to happen."

"Good. Because I might be sorely tempted to thump you if you did." Sirius smiled, and it was surprisingly shy for someone who'd been so brash before. "I've been tempted to kiss you for months now. Since you came over to yell at me about the Black Death I think."

"But not before that?" Remus teased.

"Oh, no. There's something about facing Death that makes a man more conscious of his mortality. It also has a tendency to act as an aphrodisiac." Sirius slipped his arms around Remus' waist.

"Death? An aphrodisiac?"

"Do you know how many babies are born during wars or right after them?" Sirius asked. "It's all there in the histories."

Remus suppressed a chuckle. "Even fake deaths of the fake plague in a classroom?" 

"Even then." Sirius leaned in to kiss him again. "God, Lupin, I hate to let you go, but I might be tempted to do this even longer, and we don't want the kids to know about this yet."

"Yet?" Remus' eyebrows rose.

"Well, they probably will become aware of it if we end up getting married."

"Married?" Remus repeated. "Jumping ahead of yourself, aren't you?"

"I am unapologetically and enthusiastically optimistic about us," Sirius said with a grin. "I intend to make sure you feel that way too."

Remus grinned in return. "Being afraid of nothing."

"Exactly." And despite his earlier warning, Sirius kissed him again.


End file.
